Who's boys are these?

Not all boys are as disgusting as you think...But mine is worse! No, really, there should be a new description of nasty in the dictionary with the picture of my third child!  Not only does he play in the trash, eats things off the floor, stick stuff in the toilet and then back out again, but he is fascinated with Poo!!!  It is unreal the amount of poop this child has come in contact with over the short span of his two-year life. No, not just his. Although, that is his favorite. I know what you're thinking. What is wrong with her? Why doesn't she keep a closer eye on her child? It's because this kid has to have been some sort of stealthy ninja in a previous life! Literally, I go to the bathroom to brush my teeth or apply a little bit of make up and I come out and it's like I've entered a tipped over Port-O-potty disguised as my living room. I believe we've touched base about how he likes to be naked, and stick his hands in his pants. Is there a doctor I can talk

"Sharks have two penises"—Corbin (age 5) This was one of the first facts my son knew about sharks, and blurted out to random strangers. No joke, he used to get in trouble at school for making "shark noises". Really he was just humming the theme to Jaws. This is in kindergarten we're talking about. There was a little girl who went home from school telling her mom that there was a real live shark boy in her classroom.  She was serious!  And so his obsession began along with calling himself Great White Corbin. I can't make this stuff up if I tried. It all began after we saw shark week that summer, right before kindergarten, when he was five years old...And his little brain was ready to soak up some knowledge. Well he loved it of course! He wanted to know everything there was to know about sharks and he thought he could become one when he grew up (hence the title Great White Corbin). We started collecting more rubber toy sharks then we had Hot wheels. We bought

Tuesday: So this morning I woke up with a little bit of food poisoning from last night. My printer would not print off my assignments that I stayed up until 1am doing....but a quick stop at OfficeMax and it all worked out.  Had a really good day at school, gave a speech and presentation like a boss. Then the boys came home and we decided to do Halloween decorations on the front porch. That's when it started going downhill. The garage door wouldn't shut and I had a mini meltdown...yes, I called my husband and cried while he talked me through it. Pity party for myself. Wednesday:  It was mostly without incident.... Except for when Lincoln decided to eat dog food and flood the bathroom. Oh, and the boys had dentist appointments. Odie was all numb and bit the side of his lip and cheek so much, it is just raw! Also, I ran with scissors and cut my arm.  I'm so blonde sometimes. We also did FaceTime with Scott tonight, (which we do every night) except tonight all the boys started

Today marks the first day of a full week of me going it alone. And so far I have to say...it sucks. I would never want to be a single mom! Just in the last 24 hours I shattered my ankle (not really) by kicking a giant metal dump truck in the middle of the night, found plastic ninja stars in the toilet, lost the dog then found him again, and just now little Lincoln decide to spill a massive cup coffee (that I desperately needed) all over my laptop and my earbuds, which only had one working ear piece....Doubt they work at all now. And don't judge me on having coffee this late. I've got schoolwork to do still.  The one good thing that did happen today was that I didn't have to cook thanks to my MIL, she took us out to dinner. And it wouldn't be a Werling dinner out if someone didn't throw up (Lincoln). This is going to be chaos. I predict you all will be seeing me on the news shortly. Headline: Crazy mom goes on the rampage!  I will break down, these kids will get the

Sometimes, I just don't know what I would do without grandparents. Recently, I had my mom and dad fly down so we could go to a wedding in Austin. It's hard because they live in Indiana and we live in Texas but somehow they're always there when I need them. My mother-in-law too, she has never told us "no" (that I can recall). Even after finding out we were expecting number three, she swore she would never watch them all overnight. Not all three...Her words. Well guess who's bought a minivan for the grandkids? I know they love them and I'm sure the best part about being my kids' grandparents is giving them back to me but I still don't know what I'll do if they weren't around. And don't get me wrong, we're not the kind of folks that drop them off every weekend. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just that things happen and soccer games are booked at the same time and there's only two of us. No Jane, I'm not

I know it's been a while since my last post. And I was actually starting to doubt myself and think I couldn't do this. I mean what if I run out of material? This was literally just running through my mind and then I glanced at the toilet paper roll and saw the most disgusting thing in the world! And then it hit me, I'm never going to run out of material these boys are disgusting. So just a warning, this one's going to be nasty. A while back, my youngest Lincoln was going through a phase. Probably the same phase most crazy toddlers go through. Naked time. He would usually strip down to nothing but socks and then want to stay that way for the remainder of the day. Needless to say this left lots of little "messes" for me to clean up. One in particular I will never forget. It was a quiet afternoon at home and the big boys were doing homework while I was using the restroom...Or possibly trying to save my sanity by locking myself in a tiny little room where I could